Tag Archives: vacation

ruminating

Leave a reply

It’s been a bit quiet around the blog lately, but not in our lives. 

The election was of course a dark time for us, as for many others. I am bitter and I cannot understand my fellow Americans. My heart is broken for all of the people who will suffer under this regime of unbridled ignorance, hate, greed and stupidity – gay and lesbian couples, bi, trans and all others who fear for their safety and their rights to live openly and love freely. The migrants who live in fear for themselves and their family members being harassed, hurt, put into camps and deported. Women and girls who will go without vital health care, contraception, and the right to safe abortions. And who have to know that a man found guilty of rape is considered by a majority of the country to be worthy of the presidency. The kids and families who have survived and those yet to be victimized by school shootings and then see the MAGA deplorables wear their NRA pins and show their AR-15’s in Christmas pictures. I’m disappointed and angry. And more than anything I just hope we have the right to vote again in 4 years. 

However, after the election, Brandon and I got on an airplane in rainy Detroit and after a day of travel, were disgorged, disheveled, in hot and humid St. Croix. We spent the next week there, living in a remote seaside villa with 15 other people that I’ve never met before (childhood friends of Brandon’s). I can guarantee you that we did not see eye to eye on politics with at least half of our fellow houseguests but do you know how many times politics came up? Zero times. For that week we lived quite comfortably and happily in that small community where we were mutually respectful, shared food and time and space and resources, and enjoyed each other’s company. I wanted to love them for the people they are and not even know how they voted and for that brief moment I was able to do that. It was healing to my soul.

I don’t know how to reconcile this with my feeling of deep disappointment in and anger towards MAGA voters. I have wrestled for a long time with my feeling that this is more than a political disagreement, it’s a disagreement on fundamental values and human rights. I don’t have answers about how to reconcile and move forward, but I feel in equal measure that this knowledge and identification of community over and above rage baiting means that we are capable of doing better. I don’t have answers. But if anything, the election and the weeks following have made me think that the answer for me is grassroots. I am motivated to be more kind, to seek to understand and build in my community. I want to work less and volunteer more. I don’t want to argue about politics on the Internet or at all. I don’t want to cut people out of my life but I don’t want to suffer fools or villains. I want to defend and protect those among us who need it. I want to do better, be better and more compassionate while also demanding that same compassion and accountability from the people in my life. And to know how to move forward and beyond them if that isn’t given. I just don’t know the answers on how to seek common ground and live as humans and not parties, and truly if those are even the right questions when such fundamental issues are at stake.

That may be the work of years, not days or weeks. 

Sigh.

Now we are getting ready for Thanksgiving next week – we are hosting my family so this weekend will be housecleaning, menu planning, and shopping, in between the kiddo’s indoor soccer games. We got our first mild snow on Thursday – nothing that really stuck, but after a very mild autumn, it was thrilling to see the weather finally catching up. I hope that you are all well and safe and that you have time to enjoy your people and your communities. 

~b a h a m a s~ spring break 2024

1 Reply

We’ve just enjoyed a week in the Bahamas for the kid’s Spring Break. She was such a trooper about last year’s Colonial Williamsburg Spring Break that this year we promised and delivered a tropical trip.

Not knowing much about the traditional island vacation destinations we picked Atlantis in the Bahamas. We were fortunate to have very easy travel days and no flight issues on JetBlue. The resort itself is sprawling and has several gorgeous pools, a water park with an extensive lazy river, slides through aquarium tanks, open air habitats for turtles, mantas and sharks. There are different hotels in the resort complex and we stayed at the Royal, close to the park and pools. This was good for the kid but Brandon and I agreed that if we were ever to return, we’d stay at the Cove, which is quieter, more sedate, and private. However, the rooms were very quiet, the walls thick, and we heard nary a disturbing peep from our neighbors.

This year has already been pretty stressful for all of us for various reasons so we had no plans to do anything other than go somewhere warm and relax. We didn’t book any excursions or sightseeing, which is unusual for us. For most of the trip, we were parked poolside. The beaches were not busy – the waves were high during our stay and the resort staff kept people away from the water. Beach chairs went fast and the pools were less windy, closer to bathrooms and amenities. The weather was consistently excellent- warm and bright, high 70’s and perfect for poolside lounging. I donned my coastal grandmother bucket hat and white Oxford shirt and read several books. There were multiple bars and restaurants and a resort casino featuring a few spectacular Chihuly installations. And we walked through the marina, full of sleek long yachts against the almost surreal backdrop of the sun setting in the palm trees.

The downsides were standard. The resort is simply enormous and busy – Vegas on the beach. You have to plan meals and make reservations and be prepared to stand in line and pay top dollar for everything. (Luckily we eat early so we generally did not have a problem finding tables.) Pool and beach chairs go fast and people go down early to claim the best ones (again, not a problem for us, since eating early = going to bed early = getting up early. We were generally poolside by 8:30. However, we did see many late-risers wandering around sadly at about noon, looking for empty chairs and bemoaning the long lines for towels and water slide wristbands.) It is not all-inclusive so you simply bleed money. Everything is ridiculously upcharged. Case in point- although we packed sunscreen, we went through it faster than expected (hello pale Midwesterner skin) and were forced to pay TWENTY SEVEN DOLLARS for one bottle from the resort store.

stalking resort cats

There was great people-watching (Brandon: “I can’t remember a trip as rich in its interface with raw humanity!”) We saw an unfortunate amount of panic over lost items poolside including one woman in hysterics over a lost phone and another over a lost passport. We saw many dead-eyed parents dragging overtired, underfed, wailing kids through the corridors. We heard many rote intonations of “get off the floor”, “my God can’t we take you ANYWHERE WITHOUT HAVING A SCENE” and even an “I WILL LEAVE YOU HERE” as kids melted down. We saw a dad push a stroller into the bar looking for his wife who was there drinking champagne only to have the kid pluck her champagne flute out of her hand and send it sailing across the bar to crash into splinters as he looked on, expressionless. We heard rumors of one part of the hotel in which the elevator lines could be prohibitively long at the end of the day, stretching down the corridor, filled with screaming children and strollers.

I don’t know if we’d go back – next year we may do a cruise or go somewhere all-inclusive – but we were happy to get away and have a sunshine break and for what we were looking for, this fit the bill perfectly. I have stored up sunshine in my bones for the remainder of our sullen Michigan spring.