Category Archives: politics

excerpts, redacted, from emails regarding current events.

Excerpt from newsletter from xxxx (redacted) Family Institute, received on September 11 at 5:09 PM:

When the World Feels Like It is Breaking. Everyone is talking about the death of Charlie Kirk, and everything related to it. And if we’re all talking about it, it means it matters. People are angry. They want their voices to be heard. They’re trying to make sense of horrors that feel senseless. Minds are spinning with painful images, and uncertainty about what’s next…I am noticing hopelessness creeping in. Use ‘I’ statements…model forgiveness…May you find strength to hold your children, courage to hold your grief, and hope to keep showing up.

My response, sent September 11 at 6:27 PM:

Dear xxxx (redacted) Family Institute: I will unsubscribe to your mailing list, but I also felt that it was important for you to understand why I am unsubscribing. Here is an “I” statement for you: I find it incredibly troubling that you would send out this message in response to the death of a man who advocated – nay, reveled in – so much gun violence, racism and misogyny, yet not in response to the multitude of school shootings that have occurred. One even occurred yesterday and yet that merits no mention from you – although the death of a single individual did. And not just any individual – an individual who openly stated that gun deaths were a price worth paying to protect the 2nd Amendment (obviously not meaning his own – other people’s – schoolchildren being fine – everyone besides MAGA folks), a man who suggested -and continued to suggest up to the moment of his death – that transgender individuals were responsible for a majority of mass shootings and “gang violence” responsible for more, that children should be witness to public executions, that the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was a “huge mistake”, who called MLK Jr. “awful”, that being gay was an “error”, etc, etc…among a plethora of other statements of hatred and bigotry.

I can only hope that your organizational priorities also include supporting children and families who feel broken living in a society that is showing the undeniable taint of the violent propaganda, hatred, and unfettered access to firearms espoused by people such as Charlie Kirk, who has merited – for some perplexing reason – such a place of honor in this newsletter.

Yours sincerely,

etc.etc.” 

february 28 economic blackout.

Read more here.

If you’re mad about what’s going on, I urge you to investigate grassroots efforts to show your disgust.

DEI is NOT the monster that MAGA makes it out to be. Personally, I have benefited from DEI and I would imagine many of you have, as well, even if it’s not transparent to you. DEI initiatives support pay equity and job protections for working women (so we have a job to return to after maternity leave, for example, and facilities for nursing mothers). They also ensure equal hiring opportunities for women and prevent discrimination and harassment in the workplace. These are things that I and most if not all of the women I know have relied upon, even if they’re not aware of them or don’t intellectually understand how critical they are to our ability to support ourselves and our children and pursue our careers with dignity and equality.

In addition, they provide accessible workplaces for employees with disabilities, and they prevent gender, race, and age discrimination in employment, among others. These protections exist to ensure that companies attract, consider, and support a broad range of candidates and that ANY qualified candidates – no matter their race, gender, ethnicity, age, and status – are not overlooked in hiring.

These are just a few of the most obvious ways that DEI has made our workplaces safer and more efficient.
I fail to see how these are bad practices.

So I will be planning ahead and participating in the February 28 economic blackout.

ruminating

It’s been a bit quiet around the blog lately, but not in our lives. 

The election was of course a dark time for us, as for many others. I am bitter and I cannot understand my fellow Americans. My heart is broken for all of the people who will suffer under this regime of unbridled ignorance, hate, greed and stupidity – gay and lesbian couples, bi, trans and all others who fear for their safety and their rights to live openly and love freely. The migrants who live in fear for themselves and their family members being harassed, hurt, put into camps and deported. Women and girls who will go without vital health care, contraception, and the right to safe abortions. And who have to know that a man found guilty of rape is considered by a majority of the country to be worthy of the presidency. The kids and families who have survived and those yet to be victimized by school shootings and then see the MAGA deplorables wear their NRA pins and show their AR-15’s in Christmas pictures. I’m disappointed and angry. And more than anything I just hope we have the right to vote again in 4 years. 

However, after the election, Brandon and I got on an airplane in rainy Detroit and after a day of travel, were disgorged, disheveled, in hot and humid St. Croix. We spent the next week there, living in a remote seaside villa with 15 other people that I’ve never met before (childhood friends of Brandon’s). I can guarantee you that we did not see eye to eye on politics with at least half of our fellow houseguests but do you know how many times politics came up? Zero times. For that week we lived quite comfortably and happily in that small community where we were mutually respectful, shared food and time and space and resources, and enjoyed each other’s company. I wanted to love them for the people they are and not even know how they voted and for that brief moment I was able to do that. It was healing to my soul.

I don’t know how to reconcile this with my feeling of deep disappointment in and anger towards MAGA voters. I have wrestled for a long time with my feeling that this is more than a political disagreement, it’s a disagreement on fundamental values and human rights. I don’t have answers about how to reconcile and move forward, but I feel in equal measure that this knowledge and identification of community over and above rage baiting means that we are capable of doing better. I don’t have answers. But if anything, the election and the weeks following have made me think that the answer for me is grassroots. I am motivated to be more kind, to seek to understand and build in my community. I want to work less and volunteer more. I don’t want to argue about politics on the Internet or at all. I don’t want to cut people out of my life but I don’t want to suffer fools or villains. I want to defend and protect those among us who need it. I want to do better, be better and more compassionate while also demanding that same compassion and accountability from the people in my life. And to know how to move forward and beyond them if that isn’t given. I just don’t know the answers on how to seek common ground and live as humans and not parties, and truly if those are even the right questions when such fundamental issues are at stake.

That may be the work of years, not days or weeks. 

Sigh.

Now we are getting ready for Thanksgiving next week – we are hosting my family so this weekend will be housecleaning, menu planning, and shopping, in between the kiddo’s indoor soccer games. We got our first mild snow on Thursday – nothing that really stuck, but after a very mild autumn, it was thrilling to see the weather finally catching up. I hope that you are all well and safe and that you have time to enjoy your people and your communities. 

kamala, obviously

If you’ve known me for awhile, relative to who I will be voting for in 17 days – it’s pretty clear already – Kamala. Obviously.

Kamala Harris is – simply put – the more qualified candidate, by leaps and bounds. She is highly educated, a former prosecutor, has served as Vice President. She has clear, coherent plans and actions to address key issues. That’s all there is to say about her.

Unfortunately, I have many more personal opinions and thus much more to say about her opponent.

I do not think Trump is fit to hold any office. I don’t think he’s even fit to be a manager in a midrate corporation, frankly. As far back in his checkered past as you want to look (from the Roy Cohn days to the Central Park Five to his media circus marriages, bankruptcies, reality television, pageants) – he has never been anything except out for his own best interests. He is a felon. He is a sexual abuser. He has made sexually suggestive statements about underage women including his own daughter.

He has stated that we will never vote again if he becomes president. He has blatantly said he will be dictator on day one. He has said terribly disrespectful things about our military and our veterans and has shown to me that his use of patriotism, Christianity and the Bible are cheap and exceptionally crass gambits for legitimacy without a shred of honesty.

I think he’s every bit as addle-brained and affected by issues of competency and coherence as anything that was ever said about Joe Biden.

I despise his racially biased rhetoric, his unwillingness to disavow white supremacy, his contempt for women, the shambles he has made of SCOTUS, and how he has stripped away healthcare for women and their right to bodily autonomy. He has inspired a clown car of stupid, crude, and hateful followers who now feel it’s acceptable to voice their hatred of anything not male and white. They demonize women and immigrants and think school shootings are false flags (to the point that they will harass, verbally abuse and threaten survivors and follow them around during visits to Washington DC – hello, Marjorie Taylor-Greene). He’s given a voice to ignorant and dishonest politicians who are equally selfishly motivated (Vance, Taylor-Greene, Gaetz, Boebert, Lake, Abbott, Cruz – I’m looking at you).

He inspired, fomented, and encouraged an armed insurrection, despite his current claims that it was an unarmed ‘day of love’. He encouraged his supporters to do violence against elected politicians of his party and those across the aisle. He watched them trample our capital, deface it, assault police officers, loot, steal, rob, all the while sitting in the White House eating fast food. He has shown that he does not respect the fundamentals of our democracy, he does not support a peaceful transition of power, and he will sow discontent and undermine our country’s democracy to stay in power. After January 6, which I watched live on multiple channels, as it happened, I cannot believe we are having any conversation that involves his political viability.

I believe Donald Trump was unfit to be president the first time around. The only thing that has changed is that he’s gotten worse. He is unfit to be president (or hold any office) ever again.

october friday check-in

It’s been such a week that I don’t even have a single photograph to add to this post! Unless you want a grocery receipt that I snapped to upload to my Ibotta app.

4 weeks since my Covid diagnosis and I am still struggling to get back to good health. I’m still very congested with a lingering cough and fatigue. I don’t know if it’s remaining Covid impacts, fall allergy symptoms, a couple of small other-type viruses or what, but I am ready to feel better again. Unfortunately no amount of taking it easy seems to be putting a dent in it and I think everyone in my life is getting a little impatient about my inability to operate at 100%.

It’s been a terrible week in the world community. I do not pretend to be knowledgeable about the complex nature of politics in the Middle East. I personally feel anti-Hamas, pro-Israel, pro-free Palestine, and solidly “people are not their governments”. These are most likely naïve statements and I would probably be told by people more knowledgeable than myself that they cannot coexist. These concepts probably put me at odds with everyone in the conflict who demands that a side be chosen. But the thought of all the babies and children and young people being murdered, raped, mutilated and traumatized is so abhorrent that I cannot believe anyone would care whether they were Palestinian or Israeli.

I have to drag my weary and dispirited bones through an ortho appointment, my first workplace-sponsored Spanish class, and a lot of driving of the kiddo for marching band activities before I can lay my head on my Friday night pillow and consider the weekend. I hope you are all as well as can be expected. xo

mostly about oxford.

pot roast had zero sympathy for my time of strife

As is often the case, my gloomy mood this week was a precursor to getting sick. I don’t know if I get sick because I am experiencing a depression, or if being depressed is a harbinger of something brewing in my system that has yet to be felt. But anyway, I was exceptionally ill with some sort of stomach issue and although I will spare you the grody details, it was the sickest I’ve been in a long time. I am thankfully a bit better now, but still dehydrated and fatigued, with lingering abdominal pain. I’m trying to ease my system back into some semblance of normalcy via the BRAT diet and a lot of hydration.

The big news around here is still the tragic Oxford High shooting and the subsequent drama with the shooter’s parents. They immediately went on the lam and during the haze of my illness Brandon was giving me updates about the situation. This is all occurring in our county and our area schools have been closed due to copycat threats so it hits very close to home.

My opinions of this are as follows:

– the parents are entirely culpable and have blood on their hands; I have nothing but rage for these fucked up Trumper parents who fostered his mental illness, put a weapon and ammunition in his hands, laughed at it and encouraged it and then, when he reaped what they sowed, ran – tried to hide in East Detroit leaving him in prison.

– the gun lobby is a murderous greedy cult and gun laws need to be changed; guns and people kill people and NO ONE NEEDS A SEMI AUTOMATIC WEAPON. Now, I know there are responsible gun owners. I have gun owners in my family and I trust them implicitly because they are absolutely committed to doing what they need to do to be safe and well trained. But now is the time for those responsible gun owners to join the fight and get loud about gun laws and about the fact that this is not okay. They need to not just toe the line quietly because they buy the whole NRA “they’re comin to take our guns” bullshit and they’d rather have people die needlessly than worry that their guns are going to be taken. I don’t want your hunting rifle but I definitely do not want AR-15s in the hands of minors! As Brandon said, these gun nuts think if a kid is killed in Biology class, it’s the 2nd Amendment that is under attack and needs to be protected. There have been 28 school shootings in 2021 and they are not going to stop until gun laws are changed. But I am glad to see that the parents have been charged – this is a positive development. Guns used in school shootings frequently come from the homes of the perpetrators. Clearly many of these people don’t care about the moral and ethical ramifications, so maybe they’ll care about what they expose their children to if they’re held legally responsible for it.

– the school district grievously failed those children; there were so many signs that this kid was a time bomb and they mishandled it to the point of negligence. He never should have been allowed back to class, knowing what they knew about his behavior this week. In addition, I would certainly hope that our superintendent would make a better showing than the Oxford superintendent who seemed to only be interested in defending the bungling rather than being open that something went terribly wrong and it is his obligation (and everyone’s) to understand what that was, take accountability, and do everything possible to keep it from happening again.

We continue to follow this situation closely and hope that our kids can get back to school as normal this week; but “normal” is now a strange and amorphous thing, and maybe does not exist at all anymore.

the real new year

To me, September has always felt like the true new year, when you buy new clothes and pencils and organize your stuff and have a new schedule to attend to. Even as a 48-year old grown woman, Labor Day to me is the time when I set new resolutions. And one of my resolutions for the true New Year is to get back to blogging on a more regular cadence. It’s been hard for me since my dad passed to find a lot of joy and comfort in self-reflection because the pain of missing him is always right near the surface. But although that has not changed, and probably will never change, because he was such a massive part of our lives, I’m ready to pick up this stitch and keep going.

So here’s a few recent photos from my camera roll to ease me back in.

I finished up my mom’s birthday socks! These took me forever because knitting also sort of fell by the wayside. These are Raveled but I’ll tell you that they are the Kia pattern by the wonderful Dawn Henderson (find her on Insta as knit.yarn.stuff) knit with Six and Seven Alfalfa base which is stunning.

The little one is back to school in-person for the first time since the pandemic. And not so little anymore. She’s vaxxed and they wear masks. (And seriously, adults – neither she or any of her friends have lodged a single complaint about full day masking. Quit your bitching. If my 13-year old can wear one without issue, SO CAN YOU.) She’s very happy to be back, and is expanding her fashion sense now that she can see all the different “lewks” at the morning bus stop. (So far she is heavily favoring a ‘90s throwback, with ripped boyfriend jeans, t-shirts of bands she probably has never listened to, combat boots and oversized flannels, with a sk8ter boi undercut for her glossy red locks.)

Watching a lot of stuff lately – a very mixed bag. A pretty bad Heidi Fleiss doc, ‘Fast Times at Ridgemont High’, and ‘Val’, which Brandon and I highly recommend. Heartbreaking and interesting and nostalgic and ultimately uplifting.

And lastly- shame, shame, shame on Texas. For my friends not in the US, this state has recently enacted the most restrictive abortion law in the country, banning abortion after the sixth week,when many women don’t even yet know they are pregnant. Moreover, the Texas law deputizes private citizens to sue anyone who performs an abortion or aids an abortion. So yeah, think – Uber driver. Friend. Any plaintiff unconnected to the patient or the provider can bring a (frivolous) lawsuit, collect attorney fees and a $10k bounty. As you may expect, this law disproportionately affects vulnerable populations- teens, and low-income populations who can’t afford to travel to obtain safe healthcare. As well as allowing a bunch of self righteous Karens and Bubbas to clog up an already taxed legal system.

Withholding critical healthcare, without ramifications for the young men who participate in insemination, without aid or assistance after that baby is born, no carveouts for rape or incest, taking choice away when this is the ultimate choice of the woman and the woman alone – nothing good can come of that. And don’t ever tell me you are “pro-life” if you don’t care what happens after that baby is born. It’s the most nonsensical and cruel virtue signaling.

Abortions will continue to occur – now they will just occur in more highly risky conditions under more barbaric and traumatic circumstances.

1 in 4 women

I hope everyone out there in the US has a fantastic Labor Day and in other areas a great end of your weekend / beginning of your week.

friday five – post election trauma edition

If I tried to identify five things this week, they would all be the same. Like many of you, I’m sure, I have been entirely subsumed by election coverage and am waiting not-so-patiently for the outcome. Every vote has to be counted. To state or imply otherwise no matter who your candidate is is indefensible.

I feel optimistic but cautious. Trump is like that character in a horror film that you can stab with a knitting needle twelve times, think is well and truly gone, and then comes crashing in through the plate glass window in the last five minutes.

I am bitterly disappointed that this election is so close. There is no defense that such a number of our fellow Americans could vote for Trump. It is infuriating to watch him on television in these days of uncertainty, lying about votes, undermining the credibility of our electoral process, sowing seeds of violence and civil unrest. In short, laying groundwork for a coup. We are the United States. We are a stable, developed democracy. How can this happen? Global conflict watchers now warn that the US faces unprecedented risk levels for political instability and election-related violence. They lay that blame at the feet of Donald Trump for his baseless and inflammatory rhetoric and his willingness to court conflict to advance his personal interests. It has no precedent in modern U.S. history and we have been brought to this place in a period of four short years of his presidency. It is terrifying to think what he would do to this country with another four.

But on the other side, hope is not lost.

Mr. Biden received more votes in history than any other presidential candidate and still counting. He has a thin but steady lead in important states. No matter what happens in the electoral college, we will likely see him win the popular vote by over 4 million. He is counseling patience and faith in our democracy. The press is no longer afraid to cut away from Trump when he lies and fact-check him on air. And people that I know that used to be Trump supporters – people who have worked elections and believe in the sanctity of our democratic process – are viewing him now with complete disgust, seeing now what they didn’t or couldn’t see before. These things have restored my faith in humanity a bit.

As did Anderson Cooper calling him an ‘obese turtle’.

It’s the little things, you know?

graphic from the oatmeal’s insta

No matter what we’ll get through it. Find your tribe and keep fighting the good fight and doing the next right thing.